Identity And Belonging

( identity is shaped by positive and negative experiences )
adept Diary,
Numbness is what I felt, never felt my parents burdens, never hear the lies of my so-c entirelyed friends, I just felt numb. I was cave in before my addiction to the morphine-like drug oxycodone; my friends said it will bring up me feel better but after one discharge I craved it like a fat kidskin craved chocolate. Didnt have anyone to trust or hope on, everything seemed like an act, and each(prenominal) I received from them was fake toleration and fake love. Family and friends never mattered; my only best friend was the drug. Choices? It was my excerption to hang out with those two-faced rats that peer pressured me; it was my choice to prefer the drug, no one elses. Back stabbed, and left for parents to watch their smooth daughter numbed by a chemical that possessed the received her.
As Im writing this tears drop cloth heavily d have got my face smudging the thick foundation book binding the beauty and innocence hidden underneath the black pump liner and fake eye lashes, looking down at my half naked proboscis as i reminisced every(prenominal) the little moments that didnt last forever and now im stuck in corner trying to figure out who I am, sesst have a man look at me for five seconds without feeling insecure.



Had a lot of dreams which transformed to visions, specie was my motive and I had only accomplished being a virgin to the fame, a virgin to the money that rained over me as I lost each piece of clothing at a time. Lust over love, is my mind set?
It all started at 19, ive been living in fear... fear to look into my own mothers eyes, im scared of looking at the dishonor she has towards me. I know its hard for her to accept the musical mode i am, sometimes as i look in the mirror and realise the external changes that have been made to my body and self being i start to interrogative sentence myself and doubt everything i have become, but i like the thrill, the attention, all the money, and all the pain. I consider myself a masochist. The pain Im feeling is caused by the...If you want to get a full essay, order it on our website: Orderessay



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